Push the Boat Out

This year marks the Queens diamond jubilee. A fact that I learned through watching daytime TV. Cultured eh! Through Twitter I learnt that we the British public are to gift the Queen with a new yacht. How dare she ask for a new yacht, doesn’t she know it’s a recession and there’s just been Christmas. Is she not aware that we have credit cards to pay off and sales to take advantage of. Tough choice Royal Yacht for Queeny or double discounts at DFS.

In the writing of this bit I thought I’d do a bit of research into this royal cheek. This act of regal audacity that has all tweeps and face bookers up in arms. I found a picture of Liz down at the yacht dealers. There she was champagne in one hand, public cheque book in the other. Sources say she demanded seats made of kittens and the windows to only be washed using children’s tears, because and I quote ” I am the motherfucking Queen”

This might not have happened. Not just the yacht dealership. All of it the Queen asking for a new yacht. Never happened, well maybe she asked Philip, but not the great British public. The person who came up with idea this was MP Michael Gove. The idea has been panned by the Government and Govey branded “out of touch”

Now there is a long tradition of public gifts to the Royal family. Many of these gifts attract visitors from all the world over. The QE II the last Royal Yacht was used as floating diplomacy for many years, entertaining dignitaries, promoting trade and investment in the UK and playing a huge part in building bridges between the UK and the rest of the world. People like to slate the monarchy as outdated elitism. In many ways it is, but depending on how you look at it, it’s stupid to have it any other way. The Queen is 85 years old, so she is hardly going to be joining to queue for Tinie Tempah tickets.

Given the choice between tea with Dave and Nick or tea with Liz and Phil most foreign investors will choose the Queen. In this time of recession we need to use everything we can to get investors to bring their jobs to the UK. If a few custard creams with the Queen on a new yacht bring in a couple of a million jobs I can’t see a downside. Oh yes the £60m price tag.. well with the adult populous of the UK at nearly 51m (depending where you look) if we all pay £1.17 the Queen can have the yacht. Maybe some of us..especially those protesting most will get a job out of it.

The QE 2


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