Please dial the meeting number,
Followed by the star,
Wait for the beep,
State clearly who you are.
The meeting hasn’t started yet,
Please listen to pan pipe tunes,
If you are the moderator,
Please key in 442,
Meeting starts, Hello everyone,
Murmur than scramble for mute,
If this is a productive use of our time,
Something does not compute.
Moderator drones on about his vision,
Inside I’m bursting with fury,
Cos we all know the project lead,
Couldn’t run a piss up in a brewery,
When the time comes I un-mute and say my bit,
Which falls upon deaf ears,
If you are going to ask and then ignore,
I may as well not be here,
Two of the conference now talking,
Taking up all of the meeting time,
Would they not be better off,
Sorting their stuff,
Off line.
Hours go by, Or so it feels,
Ears numb to each and every sound,
Please if you organise a conference call,
Wait til I’m not around.
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