Living with a Vegan Warrior

I am quite outspoken on these here pages. At times I can be quite outspoken at football (Sorry Dave) and down the pub on the odd occasion I have had a few jars. That is basically it however. I don’t want or need for people to agree with me, like I am the messiah (not a naughty boy). Usually as long as people listen and provide a good reason as to why they don’t agree in conversation, it’s all gravy. Beefy tasting gravy.

I have been a meat eater, with vegetables for garnish for 35 years. My significant other has been a vegan for 4-5 months. I can’t be more specific as these days I seem to blink and lose weeks. She is a passionate person a huge plus in any relationship. So as she climbed aboard the good ship vegan I knew this was going to be no different. Strap yourself in Sudo I said. (Cos of course I refer to myself in third person by my blog name).

I fully support her dietary choice. I always will.

If she has a change of heart and wants to eat roasted penguin because of the health benefit I will be first to see if Amazon Prime covers shipping from Antarctica. I probably wouldn’t partake as I liked Pingu as a kid and there would be significant trauma.

My SO however is now “ethically vegan” which means she tries to live for the good of the planet, causing the least possible harm as she goes. Being passionate, she campaigns for others to live the same and even has her own fledgling YouTube channel, which is extremely well produced and researched, albeit from a vegan angle.

As a meat eater, there are some meats I won’t eat. Dog, Rabbit and (if it’s ok with Findus)Horse. They are pet animals in the UK and I have close personal connections with them. That said with the exception of Dogs I would be happy for others to eat Rabbit and Horse. Just like I’m happy vegans eat vegetables and beans.

This is speciesism. (She tells me)

Yes and I have no problem with that. Dogs mean more to me than most people. They should not be eaten. Cows are bred by humans to be eaten. So I do and they taste damn good. I value both dogs and cows for hugely different reasons. Reasons that are personal to me. I am told the vegan population of the earth is on the rise. I am delighted those people have made their own personal choice. All those people can even think I am wrong to live my life how I do. Do I care? No.

Living with a vegan has very few problems. We share much love and eat different stuff, we did that anyway. Finding somewhere to eat out is somewhat problematic.

Living with a vegan warrior, causing the least possible harm? For the most part I wish she’d just live and let live.

Randy Savage vs Ultimate Warrior

Randy and the Warrior.. She might look like this.. check out YouTube to be sure.

Cloud Cuckoo Land

I went to school with some right pillocks (dummys, for US readers) they would embellish everything. One guy said he went on a Football tour to Russia in the Half Term holiday, forgetting that I’d seen him that holiday and it wasn’t whilst sharing a bottle of Russian Standard round the back of the Kremlin’s bins.

I have subsequently met adults who like to big themselves up. One being a “Karate” champion who clearly had been confined to a wheelchair for the best part of his life. Don’t get me wrong I am fully aware disabled people can participate in most sports, however this guy just didn’t have the air of a black belt about him.

In stark contrast, I am usually a hyper-realist. No dreams, very little embellishment (it’s 10″) feet on the floor kinda guy. However, recently I have been allowing my realist mind to take a back seat. It’s scary, and confusing for my friends. It’s not in the realms of utter bullshit, I haven’t been going around telling everyone I got in the Reading FC first team or anything. Although the way we are playing at the moment, I just might. No this flight of fantasy is perfectly achievable in a strange way, if, and it’s a huge if everything works out. If I was a betting man I wouldn’t take the bet.

I am trying every day to take solace within my dream. Because it does for the most part make me smile like a lunatic. It’s only when my long standing realism kicks in that it brings me down.

This cloud right now, Complete with Cuckoo is well worth the crushing lows for the highs (which are not all fiction) There may be a time where it isn’t and I have pop whatever bubble my head has me living in. The difficulty I have is managing my expectations. There are so many factors over which I have very little control, I am putting things in place to try and get close to the dream. However there are degrees of success with this. Let’s say the dream is to live with a beautiful girl in a nice house, where we have twenty dogs. (not too far away from the dream but hypothetical)

What if I get the house and the dogs, but no girl. Or if I get the girl and we only have 19 dogs. Will I be happy with that? Or will I live on thinking, this isn’t the dream? Only time will tell.

Fan-tailed Cuckoo (Cacomantis flabelliformis) 1

(BDYBIS) Of Kids and Dogs

What happens here can change it all. The rest of your life will be defined by this short period of time. Screw it all up and you may as well give up. That’s what they have you believe anyway. The Olympic finals, the Paralympics, the penalty shootouts England always lose at? No, School.

Many children have gone back to school this week after the long balmy summer we had. Ok so the two days where they could actually play outside. But they were able to get in a fair amount of Xbox/Smoking/Wanking and the over 8’s probably had some fun as well. Now they are back in new uniforms that cost their parents £400, little Timmy could have had a HD TV for that, but instead Mum had to buy him a jumper so big he will still be able to wear it when he’s 35.

The pressure to succeed for some of these kids is immense. Some parents living their dreams through their kids, it’s quite astounding. Some have the best intentions “I want my child to have all the things I haven’t got outta life” you carry on mate and he will have something you never had. An early heart attack.

Then there is the teachers, who have quotas to fill and targets to meet. This by the way is not a dig at teachers, they have 30+ little darlings in each class, a head-teacher who hasn’t actually taught for 20+ years breathing down their neck, mumbling something about the league tables and OFSTED. They are to a certain extent looking out for themselves as they have teacher training debts or mortgages to pay, so if Billy is playing the fool bringing down the averages it’s little wonder Billy is sent home when testing day arrives.

Those kids that have to do the tests, particularly final exams are told by so many people that this actually matters, some are fooled into believing it. Some have even buckled under the pressure and taken their own lives.

Two things are important at school. These are things taught to dogs in obedience classes.

  1. Know the basics
For dogs this is For children it’s:
Sit, Maths
Stay, English
Fetch, A little science but meh!
Come back when I call Don’t shit on the carpet
Don’t shit on the carpet.  

2. Socialise

For dogs: For children
Play with others Play with others
Find your place in the group Find your place in the group
Don’t be an arse Don’t be an arse

Get these right before you leave school (obedience or comprehensive (High School my american friends)) and you are more than half way there. Anything and everything else you can learn if you want to at a later date. You’ll also have the added bonus of not worrying about your voice breaking or if Beth fancies you or Brad. Or indeed if you fancy Brad more than Beth anyway.

You can be as clever as you like. But if you don’t learn the “don’t be an arse” lesson. You will never get anywhere in life.

Dog and Child Learning in the 80’s