The beast slowly approached David as he lay prone on the grass. It seemed to know he couldn’t move. It took the time to sniff David’s feet before raising its mighty head to look him in the eye. Its mouth leisurely opened and its gaping yaw slavered over his incapacitated legs.
David tried once more to move, he felt nothing below his waist. His own fault for not listening to his supervisor, a rather rotund gentleman named Jim.
“Never fell the Ellsbury tree in daylight” Jim told him.
“It’ll root around you as soon as it touches the ground” Jim said.
“Blah blah bloody great beasts Ellsbury Jacobies will eat you blah blah” Jim said.
“If the Jacobies are going to eat you.” Jim continued in Davids head. “If you were stupid enough, to cut down the tree. Listen carefully. You must.. blah blah”
Damn my short attention span thought David. As he felt the creatures warm breath on his face.
“Hi.” It said.
David thought he was hallucinating.
“Hello Mr Tree Cutter” the beast continued, it’s large round face wearing a puzzled look. “Anyone in there”
“Urm Hello.” Spluttered David.
“Thanks for cutting down my tree.”
“Erm well I’m sorry if’d I known it was your tree..”
“No, no” the beast interrupted “Thank you very much, the missus has been on about me doing it for ages, keeps sunlight out of our conservatory. You did me a huge favour”
David was now not only numb in his legs, but his head numbed too. This killer monster was apparently thanking him for improving the lighting in his house, he must be dreaming.
“Belinda noticed the light instantly. Mind you, “ the creature continued “Bit stupid doing it during the day though. Did you not hear what they say?”
That a Jacobie would eat you yes I heard that, thought David. He didn’t hear however that they would come out and talk to you first.
“I heard it.” David said quietly.
“But you decided to go ahead anyway. I like that spirit” The beast tossed his mane-topped head back and laughed a hearty laugh that allowed David to see all his razor sharp teeth. “I’m Brandon by the way”
“David.” David replied extending a hand towards the beast massive paw, twice the size of David’s head.
Brandon took his hand and shook it much more gently than David expected.
“You are in a bit of a bind there David.” Said Brandon, running his paw over the rough Ellsbury bark that wrapped round David’s legs. “I don’t think I can do anything to help you, the Ellsbury is a bugger when it takes hold.”
“You can’t help?” David felt the panic rising.
“Hang on I might have something in my garage, we don’t have long.” Brandon lumbered off as fast as his huge legs would carry him.
David lay back on the grass, still half-heartedly trying to wriggle free. He wondered what Brandon would find in his garage to help, or indeed why Brandon wanted to help at all. Was he a monster who liked to chase his prey? He seemed like a reasonable fellow maybe David could just ask him politely not to eat him.
David noticed the ground around him had become cast in a dark shadow. Great, rain he thought. All I need.
“Very sorry David. I really can’t help you. There is no time” Said an out of breath Brandon, sweat dripping off his tongue.
“You don’t have to help ok. Just don’t eat me.” Said David, hesitantly.
“What? Me, eat you?” Brandon once again looked puzzled. “I won’t eat you, I’m a vegetarian.”
“I’d heard that Jacobies ate those who cut down the Ellsbury tree.”
“Unfortunately you heard right. But I’m not a jacobie.” Brandon shouted. running towards his house, pointing above David’s head at what had cast the shadow on the ground. “That’s a jacobie. I’m sor…”
The Resident Weeble also did another Friday Fiction piece this week. Check it out here