For the Love of God / a Sandwich

Ahhh the blessed Friday lunch break, a time to contemplate another thrill packed weekend and perhaps work out a way of killing whats left of the working week. At the very least a chance to get out of the office and grab a bite to eat.

If I’m feeling flush I head to my local non-chain sandwich shop and grab one of their awesome cakes. However as I am trying to economise today I favoured the Sainburys £3 meal deal. Why do I feel the need to put this info on the blog. Well I think you my subscribers need to know I am being well fed.. No.

The lunch time run is carried out the world over. The time away from the office is a little oasis in the day. Why then did someone today feel the need to stop me and offer to pray for me. There I am minding my own business, wandering up the road when:-

“Excuse me, You look like you might need praying for. I’m from the local church, we pray for people in the streets. ”
“No thanks.” I said, quite politely.
“Well I’ll pray for you anyway.”

Yes folks it’s another post about religion. Sit back and relax because it’s about to get messy. As I watched the guy thankfully walk away, still in a slight state of shock, my choice of sandwich dislodged from my mind. I began to slowly simmer, angry at myself for being so polite, angry at him for his unwanted prayer.

Firstly how dare he assume that “I need praying for” thats like walking up to a woman and saying she needs a boob job, (I’ll re-visit the boob theme later) he’s saying I am imperfect in his eyes so I need to prayed for in order to obtain some salvation from a spiritual being who I don’t care about.

Secondly, how dare he impose his religious beliefs onto me. I have spoken before of my opinions and attitude to the beliefs of others. It’s whatever helps you through, if that doesn’t infringe on the lives of others in a detrimental way. The way this prayer was offered was a kin to that of someone trying to sell a timeshare in Tenerife, detrimental to my own personal beliefs, space, and detrimental to the religion itself to be hawked in such an inappropriate setting.

Thirdly it’s just downright embarrassing. It’s the third time in my life that I have been prayed for in a public (not church) space. People wandering by thinking I am partaking in some kind of cultish (maybe I spelt that wrong) procedure, not knowing I am just wanting a sandwich.

In the forth place, I find it extremely rude for him to say that he’d pray for me anyway, despite me saying no. That is the same as me walking up to a girl with great boobs and going:

“Great boobs, can I pleasure myself over them please.”
“No.” says the girl with the rack.
“Well I’m going to anyway.”

It’s inappropriate. I don’t want to think of him “saving me” same as the girl doesn’t want think of me doing the “five knuckle shuffle”

Moral of the story. If you want to be religious and that helps you fine. If you think your religion would help me, fine. If you force your religion upon me or others when we just want a sandwich. Expect to be compared to a wanker.